Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize