You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
I can't tonight. I'm still nursing a beach sex injury. Don't wanna talk about it.
my phone needs a breathalizer
Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
Randomize