i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Randomize
