Answer the phone when I call you in a second. Just got pulled over for getting road head, going to secretly put you on speaker phone, this should be good
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Randomize
