We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
Randomize
