True true and the only thing that will burn more than the vodka we will consume is the shame in our loved one's eyes
And yet we make it a tradition to get inappropriately drunk at family functions. We amaze me.
At least it's not a funeral this time... I feel we're making improvements.
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
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