I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
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