just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
I'm way too hungover for life right now
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
Randomize
