Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
