You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
She just used a chaser for red wine.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
Don't stress. That was a joke. I'd trust my pets with no one else. Accidents happen. Sometimes things go smoothly when you help a neighbor out and sometimes you electrocute their fish. Life is funny that way.
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
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