Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
Woke up in a pool of alcohol sweat. Probably could wring out my sheets and make a decent cocktail.
I feel like one of those toads that you lick to get high or find a prince.... cept when you lick me you find a drunk whore.
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
Randomize
