doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
I would fuck him just for his dog
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
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