If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
This is a test of Andrews drunk texting, had this been an actual drunk text, all the words would be spelled incorrectly and would be missing key verbs and nouns, followed by a request to not get fired.
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
Randomize
