Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
You made a "martini" bagel. Took a bagel dunked it in vodka and put olives in it
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Randomize