forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
nutella sex= disaster
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
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