Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
be right there i have to get my cape
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
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