I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Vodka?
Forever.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
Randomize
