before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
she pinky promised me she was 18
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
Randomize
