I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
Randomize