is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize
