I feel like abortions should bother me more
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
Randomize
