The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible
How drunk are you?
Completed.
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
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