dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
Be still, my beating vagina.
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
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