Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
I just sent him a message bearing my soul about how much he means to me as a friend and his first response is "are you drunk?"
Shit like this is why I'm a bitch to everyone.
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Randomize
