STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
Randomize
