Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
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