I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
Randomize