Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
Randomize
