dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
god damn woman. you are like the herpes of drunk texting. you never go away.
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
