Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
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