if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
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