Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
what is it with giant penises always finding me
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
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