stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
Randomize
