What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
Her roommate texted her and told her that her cat died. Now she's double-fisting bottles of wine while howling and wailing her dead cat's name. Not how I pictured this booty call.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
Last time Jon threw a party I woke up on my porch, no shirt but 4 bras on, and "make better life choices" written on my stomach in sharpie
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
