My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
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