We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
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