well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize