So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
It's never too late to be topless.
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
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