Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
why is there a dog in my house with your initials shaved in it's fur?
dude, i just woke up in a house i've never seen. i have bigger problems
Randomize