Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
Cover your peen. We're going out.
Randomize
