i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Randomize
