I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize