lets start a swedish sibling band together
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
Randomize
