Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
Randomize