He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
The woman at walgreens tried to sell me clearance condoms with my fake eyelashes. Does it look like I get laid?
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
Randomize
