your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Randomize
