I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
He wore pink swim trunks on our date and repeatedly insulted my profession, but his cat kept standing up like a person to nuzzle my face and I felt like a Disney Princess. I hate this dude, but the cat is too amazing for me to not fake interest for.
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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