im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy.
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
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