new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
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