Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
Randomize
